Club Constitution
This constitution is the binding source of conduct and knowledge in the regard of the Towers French Cricket Club, the gentlemen's social forward slash alumni forward slash elite sporting club allied to Towers Hall, Loughborough University. Outlined presently are the directives for the club to ensure that its values and prestigious name are upheld.
Mandate and Statement of Purpose for Towers Hall French Cricket Club
The Towers Hall French Cricket Club was founded in 2004 to uphold and promote values which pertain to an enhanced student life. The Club is primarily a social institution.
The Club's missions are to promote social integration, maintenance of contact, creation of memories and physical activity. Built on a simple premise that one's greatest possessions are their memories and stories, the Club was founded with a mission to actively create such memorable occasions. It seeks to encourage enjoyment and pleasure through the benefits of structure and experience. The Club is designed to create a sense of legacy in an environment where years are often forgotten from one to the next. It is also hoped that the Club will promote interaction between the halls of Loughborough University.
1. Membership of Towers French Cricket Club
• Membership of the Club is available to all possessors of XY chromosomes resident in Towers Hall. Residents of the bungalow are permitted.
• Membership status is attained through the purchase of a Club shirt at a price decreed annually by the Chief Money Shooter.
• Membership entitles the member to a Club shirt, tri-annual newsletters and information related to TFCC activities whilst residing in the Tower and life beyond.
2. The Club Committee
• The activities of the Club are governed by a Club Committee. The duty of this Committee is ensuring that the finest values of Towers Hall are communicated and upheld, and that the activities of the Club are arranged and undertaken with commitment and conviction.
• The Committee is made up of the four members of the Club Executive, who are personally selected, the five Club Prefects, who are elected, and the Token Eddie who is also personally selected.
• The Club Committee will consist of the following members:
• Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship
• Chairman of Selectors
• Chief Wedding Planner
• Chief Money Shooter
• Team Plumber
• Food & Beverage Manager
• Physical Training Instructor
• Knitwear Administrator
• Maintenance Rep
• Token Eddie
3. Duties of the Committee
Club Executive
Four positions form the Club Executive, the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship, the Chairman of Selectors, the Chief Wedding Planner and the Chief Money Shooter. These members personally select their successor. A fifth position, 'Token Eddie' is also selected; by the departing Executive. The remaining five positions are voted for by the 'Runaround' method subsequent to the Battle of Hustings.
• Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship (Squad Number #1)
To lead, guide and embody the spirit of Towers Hall and of French Cricket. This person must have great vision, strong influence and the willingness and ability to achieve these visions.
The main duties of the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship are ensuring that the Club thrives and survives, and to maintain the Club File. He is also responsible for writing the tri-annual newsletter. He will be the main link between the Hall Committee, the Warden and members of the Club. A further responsibility of this position is to keep Club member lists and contact details up to date, with the assistance of the Chairman of Selectors.
• Chairman of Selectors (Squad Number #2)
The chief defendant and upholder of the constitution. It is the duty of the Chairman of Selectors to ensure that the activities of the club are conducted according to the constitution, and also to govern any constitutional reform. Suggestions for club improvements are considered and actioned by the Club Executive. Constitutional reform is decided by a majority vote from the Club Executive in either of the two Executive meetings. In the event of a 2:2 split vote, decisions are to be made by the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship.
It is also the task of the Chariman of Selectors to pick the side to turn out in competitive (international) French Cricket fixtures. Team boards are to be placed in the foyer of the Towers Dining Hall not less than two days before each fixture.
• Chief Wedding Planner (Squad Number #3)
Principally tasked with the arrangement of the 'Golden Four' significant annual club events:-
• First Test
• Battle of Hustings
• Annual Physical Training Camp
• Long Gongs
It is the Chief Wedding planner's responsibility to create all posters and related information for each of the major events, as well as supporting this with regular announcements in Towers Dinner Hall.
The Chief Wedding Planner of each year also becomes the Marriage Liaison Officer for that year, such that any Club member who goes on to be married in future life will, in addition and not in substitute for a stag night, arrange a French Cricket Reunion in Loughborough for members from that year. All upcoming weddings should be reported to the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship, to be detailed in the Tri-Annual Newsletter.
• Chief Money Shooter (Squad Number #4)
To handle the financial matters of the Club, including the collection of all payments. Details of all Club financial movements are to be kept and given annually to the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship to store in the Club File.
Further Selected Position
• Token Eddie (Squad Number #69)
This is a unique position. The Token Eddie is selected by consensus by the departing Executive. This person must be an 'Eddie'. An Eddie has a number of distinctive features which allow them to be identified. It is by no means an insult, indeed Eddies are big factors in drumming up student spirit, but it is important that Eddies can be recognised. Be aware that not all Eddies will fulfil all criteria, but these are common traits. Such features include:
• 'Fresher of the Week' has a high chance of being an Eddie.
• An Eddie will at least run for social secretary.
• Last night could well have been awesome because of the amount of tequila drunk.
• An Eddie is likely to wear FCUK clothing at least 20% of the time.
• An Eddie would do front crawl with his head out of the water, waving from side to side, likely wearing a silver thick-linked chain.
• Eddies can be blasé and loud.
• Not being able to see on a night out is construed as a 'good thing' for an Eddie.
• Quantity has a quality all of its own when it comes to an Eddie's sexual conquests.
• An Eddie thinks a stripper is a good thing to hire for a party.
• An Eddie will ask you "Who was that bird you were pulling in Echos last night then, oi oi" and further more intimate - but crudely put - questions.
• An Eddie can be considered very socially excitable, but crucially can lack wit.
• Most often Eddies are Southern, and will call Welsh people "Sheep shaggers" then laugh, and will nickname someone from Newcastle "Geordie" - though Eddies can of course be from anywhere.
• Eddies tend to be very good at sport.
• An Eddie may well be referred to as a 'legend' by admirers, and would certainly refer to others as 'legends'.
• If asked to pick a number to go on the back of their shirt, an Eddie will go for 69.
• An Eddie will always be pleased to see you.
The Token Eddie is invited onto the Club Committee and works alongside all members of Committee, particularly the Food & Beverage Manager. The Token Eddie will assist in arrangement of social functions, as well as team fixtures - and any other Club duty required by the Committee. To level the advantage of being admitted to the Club Committee through selection, and not election, the Token Eddie will, however, have no voting rights. Their duty is to support the Club's functions with the enthusiasm, dedication, and spirit.
The Token Eddie is also the Team Choirmaster, and as such must lead all Club singing.
Club Prefects
• Team Plumber (Squad Number #5)
Responsible for ensuring that 'Bant is on tap'. (Smoothdog, Faraday, 2004). The Team Plumber is a highly important and unforgiving role, and in many ways is the Club's ambassador to the outside world. The role requires a high level of gumption and dry wit. Sub-roles include:
• Feminine Liaison Officer
• Showboat Co-ordinator
• Leader of the Haka
As the Feminine Liaison Officer, it is the Team Plumber's duty to establish and maintain relationships with those possessing XX chromosomes on behalf of the Club. Therefore, on any Club outing, should any Club member see a female who takes their fancy and report this to the Team Plumber, the Team Plumber must introduce the two in a favourable way for the Club member. Lying is permitted upon agreement with Club member. On any Club outing and an ensemble of 10 or more females from any other club is sighted, the Team Plumber must approach the apparent leader of the female group and introduce the team, their recent sporting record and inform them that "If you want to get with any of our boys, say the word and I'll fix you up good style" or words to the effect.
As the Showboat Co-ordinator the Team Plumber must be at the very forefront of any badinage during French Cricket matches, or any incidence of communication between Club members and outsiders. The Team Plumber must politely introduce himself to all members of any opposing side before matches. Constant witty abuse of all players (home and away) is expected, along the lines of "It's no co-incidence Royce rhymes with bumhole". However, abuse should not be genuinely defamatory, it should be puerile nonsense; in keeping with the Club's mandate to be a non-offensive establishment, which believes in social integration and not division.
As Leader of the Haka the Team Plumber must commence and lead the French Cricket Haka before all matches.
• Food & Beverage Manager (Squad Number #6)
Responsible for logistics and distribution of all food and beverages for the Club. Chiefly responsible, in collaboration with the Team Plumber, Token Eddie and Chief Wedding Planner, for arranging any additional social events to the standard 'Golden Four'.
Must liaise with Chief Money Shooter for the procurement of beverages, and required utensils and nourishing foodstuffs for barbeque use. All matches with non-Towers opponents are to be accompanied by a barbeque for both sides. When a barbeque is fired up, from nowhere the most unexpected man will take the reins - this man should be your Food & Beverage Manager.
• Physical Training Instructor (Squad Number #7)
The man tasked with the physical aspects of Club activity. Responsible for arranging all fixtures, in collaboration with the Chairman of Selectors and other halls of residence. Hosts the third of the 'Golden Four' events - the 'Annual Physical Training Camp'. This is to be held in the week between semester 1 and semester 2, and consists of playing lots of different team sports every day and jogging around campus en masse and looking cool and stuff. The P.T. Instructor must coach the team by looking at the latest advances in French Cricket tactics, preparing the team for all matches (catches, throwing, running, batting, gamesmanship, psychology etc.) and fitness during the Annual Physical Training Camp. Team psychology needs to be worked on in collaboration with the Team Plumber.
• Knitwear Administrator (Squad Number #8)
Has the role of designing, or commissioning the design, procuring and distributing all team 'stash'. Prices to be agreed with Chief Money Shooter. The main item, the Club shirt (purchase of which permits Club membership), is to be produced year upon year, but in addition to this each Knitwear Administrator should add items of team clothing that they deem appropriate and for which sufficient demand exists. The higher the quality and range of clothing that exists, the more proficient the Club will look, which is the desired appearance. He must also ensure that squad numbers are not replicated, particularly that no Committee numbers (e.g. 69) are chosen by unsuspecting Freshers.
• Maintenance Rep (Squad Number #9)
Responsible for the maintenance of all Club sporting equipment. This should include an All-weather pitch, the bacquet, and any safety equipment. Ideally the Maintenance Rep will possess their own powertools, and study a design based subject. The Maintenance Rep has an ongoing duty to continually add safety equipment to the Club's stores, as in modern high-level sport one cannot be too careful. Fluorescent clothing, helmets, pads, goggles etc. may all be of use to a batsman, so should be procured progressively.
4. Committee Meetings
Committee Meetings are to be held twice per semester for all Committee members, and additionally at the beginning and end of each academic year for members of the Executive. Meetings are to be chaired by the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship and minutes taken by the Chairman of Selectors for addition to the Club File.
Semester One:
• Meeting as soon as possible to discuss plans for the Club over the coming year.
• First meeting of all Committee members two weeks prior to the First Test.
• Second meeting of all Committee members two weeks prior to the Battle of Hustings.
Semester Two:
• Third meeting of all Committee members two weeks prior to the Annual Physical Training Camp
• Fourth meeting of all Committee members two weeks prior to the Long Gongs
• Final meeting of new Executive to plan for the coming year.
Upon Committee changeover all members of Committee, new and departing, are expected to take part in a formal changeover meal, where they will pass on their accrued knowledge to new Committee members.
5. Electoral Procedure
The Club Executive is elected by means of transfer of the role. Each of the four members of the Club Executive must select their successor (Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship, Chairman of Selectors, Chief Wedding Planner and Chief Money Shooter). It must be a well reasoned decision because the future of the Club largely rests in the hands of the Executive. Each departing member of the Executive will announce their successor at the Battle of Hustings, to take place in the East Park Bar (née Towers Bar). It should therefore be ensured that the nominated successors are present at the Battle.
New Committee members may come from any academic year, but it is advised that the new Executive should not be Freshers, for they have much to learn about the ways of Loughborough. Those selected who will be leaving Loughborough in the following year must be prepared to commit to return for the subsequent First Test and Battle of Hustings. Those selected will also need to be those prepared to make considerable effort to meet younger members of the Club, in order to find a suitable replacement.
The procedure for Club Prefect election is as follows: Once all new members of the Executive have been announced, the Token Eddie is announced by the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship (decided in collaboration with the departing Club Executive prior to the night). The positions up for election are then announced and described according to their summary in this document. Candidates will then be requested to come forward for each of the positions. No nominations are required. Speeches for each position will be heard - every candidate must speak for no more than one minute on what they can offer members of the Club in a West Country accent.
Voting is to take place on this night by the 'Runaround Method'. The chair of the Battle will announce a position and reintroduce the candidates. He well then allocate a different corner of the bar for each candidate to go to. Upon the command "It's time to.. RUNAROUND!" all members of the Club present are to run to the corner of the candidate they wish to be elected. After a period of not more than 30 seconds the numbers are counted and the candidate with the greatest number of followers is elected. This is to be done for each of the five positions available for election. In the event of a tie, settlement is to be made by arm wrestle.
6. Events
The 'Golden Four' are the Club's four significant annual events. It is vital that these events are upheld in order to sustain the Club. All members of Committee must attend 'Golden Four' events. The Maintenance Rep must bring the Club banner to each of the Golden Four events.
- The First Test
- The Battle of Hustings
- Annual Physical Training Camp
- Long Gongs
- The First Test
The first game of French Cricket each year. This is to consolidate Club members still in Loughborough and to introduce new Freshers to the Club. On this occasion, as many members as are willing, and Freshers who show interest, will both play the game and socialise afterwards. The Chief Wedding Planner must make all Club members from all years that are resident in Loughborough aware of these events.
- The Battle of Hustings
Hosted and chaired by the departing Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship, this is the annual elections process. The departing Executive will initially announce their chosen replacements, before the Battle takes place. Once the four new Committee members have been announced they will stand with the departing Executive as the proceedings continue. At the Battle of Hustings the following positions will be elected:
• Team Plumber
• Food & Beverage Manager
• Knitwear Administrator
• P.T. Instructor
• Maintenance Rep
- Annual Physical Training Camp
To be run in the week which splits Semester 1 and Semester 2, principally by the P.T. Instructor. This is to be a team sports week, open to all Club members. The P.T. Instructor must arrange and publicise events of each day, run the fitness sessions and ensure the week is administered in line with the Club's elite sporting ambitions.
- The Long Gongs
The annual awards ceremony. This is to be held subsequent to the completion of summer examinations, in the penultimate week before term's end. It is to be hosted by the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship and the Team Plumber. Dress is suits and awful shirt/tie combos. Categories for award are permitted to vary year on year, but the following must be included at every ceremony:
• Prodigus Carinus - for the person who has, overall, believed in the spirit of Towers and given the most to Towers French Cricket. The highest award of the Club. This person receives the 'Golden Crash Helmet' - the most venerable award in Loughborough French Cricket.
• Most Valuable Player - the player who performed to the highest standard in terms of runs and wickets.
• Defining Line of the Year - the person from whose mouth the most amusing utterance came whilst on French Cricket duty. This should be done in a top 5 format, though with only one winner.
• Best Overseas Player - the player from another halls who has best involved themselves in the spirit of French Cricket. Should be prior warned to ensure attendance.
7. Club File
The Club File, cautiously guarded by the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship, is the record of all information relating to the Club. Its sections describe details of constitution iterations, and previous activities of the Club. It is to be handled only by the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship.
8. Additional Activities of the Club
• Minuting Socials (Glory of idea: Ben Cooper)
Upon occasion of Club social events, the Chairman of Selectors must take with him paper and writing implements to record events of the night. Here are transcribed amusing quotes and happenings over the course of the night. This is then added to the Club File under the section 'Booze Notebook' in its original form, complete with stains and drawings.
• Thankyou Jeffrey (Glory of idea: Jeffrey Szeszko)
Whenever the clocks go back or forward, all Club members presently residing in Towers should meet at the front of the Dining Hall at a suitable time decreed by the Leader of the Frownfree Fellowship. In the event of the clocks going back, all Club members must walk backwards from the Dining Hall to the Tower sipping Port- supplied by the Food & Beverage Manager - and greeting the first sip with the exclamation "Thankyou Jeffrey". When the clocks go forward, members are to walk forwards from the Dining Hall to the Tower, again sipping Port and saying "Thankyou Jeffrey" and holding receptacles up briefly in a 'cheers' motion.
• Tell'im (Glory of idea: Gareth Webb)
On any Club social event, whilst wearing Club clothing, the game "Tell'im" will be in operation. The rules of this game are thus: In the presence of the Team Plumber, any statement of opinion or judgement of another person without that person having heard must be followed by the statement 'Tell'im'. If not, the Team Plumber has the opportunity to say 'Tell'im' (or Tell'er if the person is female) before you do, and you must go and tell the person what it was that you said about them.
e.g. "Oh my god she is so fit. I want to make her feel wonderful." Team Plumber: "Tell'er" - you must tell the aforementioned lady in the same words.
e.g. "That bloke's trainer boots are absolute gash." "Team Plumber: "Tell'im" - and he must be told.
8. Rules of the Game: French Cricket
The rules by which Towers Hall French Cricket Club is to play French Cricket are hereby defined. The Maintenance Rep must bring the Club banner to all international matches.
French Cricket Rules
There are two rule codes which are applicable to the Towers Hall French Cricket Club.
• International Code
• Domestic Code
In the circumstance of an international match, against another halls, the International Code is employed. The key differences relate to batting order.
International Code:
• Each team must provide an 11 man batting order before the match, to be submitted to a mutually selected umpire.
• The game has two innings for each team. Upon a decision by the 'Scissor, paper, stone' method, the winning captain chooses to bat or field. Once all 11 batsmen are dismissed, the opposing team bats.
• The winning team is that which has accrued the most runs over their two innings.
In the International Code the game is limited to 11 players per side, with the addition of a 12 th man for substitute/scoring purposes.
Domestic Code:
Batting order in the Domestic Code is determined by the following means:
• If the batsman was bowled out the fielder who last threw the ball takes up the bat.
• If the batsman was caught out the catcher takes the bat.
• If the batsman is out by any other method, the player who has spent longest, uninterrupted, in the field takes up the bat.
The game can be played with any number of players greater than three, although more than 11 is not recommended.
Set-Up
A circular boundary should be marked around the game of play, with the batsman's stance central to this circle. The radius of the circle is adjustable depending on the number of players, the physical fitness of the fielders and the length of time since anyone playing had a heavy meal. This forms the boundary for shots worth 4 and 6 runs.
A batsman is nominated - he must take up the bacquet and plant his feet firmly together in the batting stance - feet together and bacquet held vertically in front of the shins. If an official bacquet is unavailable, it may be replaced with a tennis racket. The other players are designated fielders. Ideally the Club all-weather pitched should be used. If unavailable, the batsman marks a crease, which is a circle created with the tip of the bacquet held at arm's length.
One of the fielders must take up the ball and retire with it to a spot approximately six yards from the batsman in the direction he is facing.
Game commences. The batsman must aim to hit the ball as far as possible. If he hits the ball he may move round to face the direction of the newly incoming ball. If he fails to hit the ball, he must remain with his feet in the same position and twist his torso round to face the ball. The wicket - the target for the fielding team - is the batsman's legs - any point below the knee on either side. The batsman is considered to be out if he:
• Is hit on the legs by the ball (bowled).
• Moves his feet at any time from their original resting place, or falls so that his hand(s) touch(es) the ground while his feet remain stationary.
• Is caught out (a ball the batsman has hit is brought to rest by a fielder before the ball has hit the ground).
• Does not hit the ball out of the crease circle.
• Hits the ball twice before it touches a fielder.
Rules For Run Scoring
Runs are scored after hitting a ball and can be made by passing the bat from one hand to another, behind the back, in a complete circle around one's body. All complete runs made before a fielder picks the ball up are counted. If the ball is hit over the boundary without bouncing, six runs are scored. If the ball is hit over the boundary, but touches the floor en route , four runs are scored. Both teams must have a nominated scorer.
Rules For Fielding
After the game commencing initial throw, each successive throw must be made from the position the thrower was standing when the ball was picked up. The only exceptions to this are after no-balls (see below) and boundaries, when the ball is returned to the initial bowling position.
At no point should a fielder proceed inside the crease circle to grope, tickle or otherwise harass the batsman.
A no-ball is bowled when:
• The ball bounces outside the crease before reaching the batsman. The ball is permitted to bounce within the crease, but if it stops there, the batsman is permitted to hit at it at his leisure.
• The fielder moves his feet after picking the ball up and bowling.
• At no point in its flight does the ball proceed within the crease circle at a height between the batsman's feet and his shoulders.
In each of these cases the batsman scores one run. A batsman cannot be out off a No-Ball, and any further runs that are scored off the No-Ball can be counted towards the batsman's score.
Note that not every ball has to be directed towards a batsman's legs. It is perfectly legal to throw the ball to another fielder, providing the ball crosses the crease, and does not bounce prior to the crease.
Ending the Game
International Code games are finished once both sides have batted their two innings and the runs have been tallied. A Domestic Code game is played for a fixed time limit, usually defined as that until the participants' families or girlfriends force them to do something else, or until at least one player is suffering from heat exhaustion and/or dehydration.
Matches are to be catered for by the Food & Beverage Manager. At the end of the first innings for both home & away team, half time oranges - pre-sliced - are to be brought out and offered to each side. Matches should be proceeded by a barbeque for both sides.
Win or lose, on the booze.